Au Cochonnet Marin

“You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy weed… and that’s pretty close.”

Since January 1^st, the sale of weed is legal in California. This means that if you are above 21, you can now lawfully get stoned, wasted… or both.

But it is not as bad as it sounds. Regardless of what Conservatives are saying, decriminalizing marijuana is the smart thing to do. Legal or not, the stuff has been around for a long time and profited none but a few.

With the legalization of marijuana, a huge amount of tax money is going to flow into the state’s coffers and benefit many worthwhile organizations. In addition, the decriminalization of weed is also going to reduce prison’s populations and substantially lower state’s expenses.

Previously, if you lived in California, you often came across whiffs of marijuana wherever you went. Now it is going to be as common, as the smell of hot dogs or popcorn.

Marijuana, like booze, will get you high and drastically impair your cognitive functions. DUI (Driving Under the Influence) now also means that you will get prosecuted for driving while under the influence of weed. With freedom comes greater responsibilities; as with alcohol, you are going to need a designated driver if you want to indulge and stay out of trouble.

If you plan to purchase some weed, you need to know a few things about it.

First of all, marijuana is made from hemp.

“Hemp or industrial hemp is a variety of the Cannabis sativa plant species that is grown specifically for the industrial uses of its derived products.  It can be refined into a variety of commercial items including paper, textiles, clothing, biodegradable plastics, paint, insulation, biofuel, food, and animal feed.
Hemp has lower concentrations of THC (Tetrahydrocannabinol) and higher concentrations of cannabidiol (CBD), which decreases or eliminates its psychoactive effects.”

You can now buy from 1 gram to 28 grams (one ounce) of cannabis. You could purchase an eighth of an ounce (3.5 grams), a quarter of an ounce (7 grams), half an ounce (14 grams) or a full ounce (28 grams).
One ounce of weed is going to cost between $200 and $300 depending on the quality and the competition.

“If the whole world smoked a joint at the same time, there would be world peace for at least two hours.”

Think about it, citizen Trump.
Instead of using a “bigger button” to nuke North Korea, what about flooding it with tons of marijuana? The B-52s are big enough to do the job.
With the entire Korean peninsula under the influence, it might be easier to bring a mellowed out “Rocketman” to the negotiation table and get away from an unthinkable nuclear confrontation.

 Alain

I am a quick study – I can memorize a script in an hour – but I can’t remember a name three seconds — Don Adams

For some people memorizing names can be difficult. They might remember the face but not the name, and this can be embarrassing. So as a public service (and out of the goodness of my heart) I elected for 2018 to put a name on each and every face of our club members.

Most of the people like to see their names in print while some feel uneasy about it. So, if anybody feels uncomfortable about seeing his or her moniker on the marquee of my theater, please give me a whistle and it will disappear in the blink of an eye.

Sometimes nicknames stick to people more tenaciously than their own names and there is nobody more notorious in our club than Le Facteur (the Mailman), aka Jean-Michel Poulnot. He is now retired, but even in retirement, a president remains a President.

There are also lesser-known nicknames such as Minou and Minette (Genevieve and Jean-Claude Etallaz) and La Bête Noire or La Foudre but none are as legendary as our own Facteur.

Our name is our identity. Every action one does affect his name, so think about it before doing something rash.

It is good to have name recognition. It is particularly helpful if you ever intend to run for president. In America, absolutely anybody can become president, as proven by the last election.

So without further ado… roll of drums… you can now peek at my latest photographic essay. I am not allergic to compliments… Feel free to express your approval if you like it.

Meilleurs vœux de bonheur et de santé a tous !

La Foudre

“There are women named Faith, Hope, Joy, and Prudence. Why not Despair, Guilt, Rage, and Grief? It seems only right. ‘Tom, I’d like you to meet the girl of my dreams, Tragedy.” ― George Carlin

He is short… about 3 feet from head to toe, but don’t let this small detail fool you. It is said that “dynamite comes in small packages” and spending a week with a grandchild can be a volatile affair.
It is a very TALL order to babysit a short kid.

He may look like an angel, but this cherub-faced imp is Beelzebub in disguise. Barely two and a half, this kid has a short fuse… and a long memory. If he does not get his way, he will protest, loudly.

Fortunately, like a hero of Ancient Greece he was fitted with two Achilles heels: food and cars. He can, therefore, be distracted and bribed with grub or a new toy.

He has a limited vocabulary but understands more than he lets on. His uncertain pronunciation makes him difficult to comprehend but he will righteously correct you if you misunderstand him.

He is as cute as a button and wherever he goes, this charmer projects the same charisma as a pretty girl. The bouncer will always give him an automatic pass without checking his bag. He may carry three pounds of dynamite, but his seraphic smile wards off any further inspection.
By the way, never try to take away what you give to a kid. They are absolutely intransigent about that. A deal cannot be broken!

Nowadays grandparents need a lot of stamina to keep up with grandchildren.

Children are like crazy, drunken small people in your house. Julie Bowen

 If you ever accept to take care of your grandchildren for more than 3 days, you better go through a Marines Corps fitness program before letting the little tykes invade your domain. Hand to hand combat training might also be a good idea.

But no matter how demanding this experience can be, it is also rewarding. There is nothing more gratifying than the smile of a small child.

And they are never more endearing than when they are resting in the arms of Morpheus clutching their security blanket.

Alain