Au Cochonnet Marin

Fuck this.
Fuck this wondering. Fuck this trying and trying. Fuck this belief that two people can become one ideal. Fuck this helplessness. Fuck this waiting for something to happen that probably won’t ever happen. — David Levithan

I am not a prude and I am not easily shocked, but I am fed up with nincompoops who cannot utter three words without saying “fuck”. This is fuckingly annoying!

Parroting is the sign of an underdeveloped mind and if you are an idiot, there is no need to advertise it. On the other hand, if you are addicted to the “fuck” sound and cannot kick the habit, try at least to vary your vocabulary by using similarly sounding words. And there are plenty of them rhyming with “fuck”.

For instance, you could use any the following: buck, duck, luck, muck, puck, suck, tuck, yuck. They are all honest English four-letter words capable to satisfy your sleazy instincts, and they all sound right.

So now, you have no excuse for using that worn out, overused, recycled, warmed-over term. English has a large vocabulary and is a very adaptable language. New words can be coined every day without any problem. If you are not satisfied with the existing words, create your own… something like the brilliant “Trumpism” “covfefe”.

You don’t want to be a mere follower, do you? You want to be a pioneer, an innovator, a leader. Don’t be like a crass rapper who fills his angry diatribes with obscenities simply to be noticed.

If you need some inspiration to be creatively angry, simply watch the news on TV. There is enough stuff out there to make Buddha (“one who is awake”) loose his cool.

To be a leader instead of a sheep, discard the “monkey sees, monkey does” philosophy and dare to be different.

Dare to be polite and compassionate. Use soothing words like blessed, delicious, divine, golden, heavenly…

You will have to admit that “bless you” is a cut above “fuck you” and that “this heavenly thing” sounds more palatable than “this fucking thing”.

Dare to be cleverly different. It is way smarter than to be a vulgar parrot.

Alain

Comme un invité qui abuse de son séjour, comme une diva en tournée, la pluie prend ses aises. Elle est arrivée en grande pompe et sera encore avec nous pour un temps indéterminé (avec ses sautes d’humeur naturellement).

Cette pluie qui aurait été tellement utile lors des incendies catastrophiques de l’été dernier, cette pluie est finalement arrivée… avec le ban et l’arrière-ban.

Après des semaines de pluies torrentielles, la sècheresse qui a sévi pendant des années a disparu pour faire place à de nouveaux problèmes. La Californie est maintenant en proie à des inondations et des glissements de terrain spectaculaires. Boue et rochers obstruent les routes, et un grand nombre de voitures et de maisons sont submergées par l’eau.

Quelques petites villes isolées ne sont maintenant accessibles que par bateau. Guerneville entre autres est présentement une ile.
La « Russian River » a atteint un niveau de 14 mètres, ce qui constitue un record pour les dernières 25 années.

Affaiblis par l’eau, de grands arbres se sont abattus sur des demeures, des voitures ou des poteaux électriques causant d’importants dégâts.

Les égarés qui doutent encore du changement climatique, doivent probablement être en train de réviser leurs opinions… sur le toit de leurs maisons ou sur des radeaux de fortune.

A l’encontre du fameux « Mur », la situation en Californie constitue une véritable « urgence » qui demande l’aide fédérale. Il faut espérer que malgré ses déboires politiques et son aversion pour la Californie, le résident de la Maison Blanche fournira sans délais les fonds nécessaires à la reconstruction de l’état le plus progressif de l’Union.

“Being soaked alone is cold. Being soaked with your best friend is an adventure.” Emily Wing

 Alain

Afterthought

“When people try to rain on your parade, poke them in the eye with your umbrella.”

Enjoy life now. This is not a rehearsal.

 Did you ever catch yourself saying “one of these days”? If you did (be honest), you are a confounded procrastinator.  Pro-cras-ti-na-tor… (sounds like a Russian insult).
You would rather do later, tomorrow, next week, next year, what you should be doing NOW.

“Procrastination is like masturbation. At first it feels good, but in the end, you’re only screwing yourself.”– Author unknown

Time flies. It is an old saying but it is still highly relevant today. Unbeknownst to you, time goes by at the speed of a galloping horse.

I booked a cruise in 2018 thinking that I had plenty of time to prepare, but it is now banging on my door and I am still in my pajamas. It has become a matter of days and I better start panicking… I usually leave this occupation to my wife, but this time I have to morph into “action man”

Don’t wait for Father Time to shake your tree. Do now what you have always wanted to do. Like my friend Daniel, jump (repeatedly) with a parachute. Ride a motorcycle, go bungee jumping, tango in Argentina, get married, get divorced…

Don’t wait. Do it now. The future is promised to no one.

I am prompted to emphasize this because recently a member of our pétanque family had a cardiac mishap that could have been fatal. A quick trip to emergency prevented a tragedy, but it is a warning shot across the bow.

You need to listen to your body and see a plumber immediately when your pipes get clogged.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse can be on you in a minute. Unlike our mythical WALL, they are real and they don’t take no for an answer.

Moral of the story

Enjoy yourself while you can for there is no guaranteed tomorrow.

Alain