Category: Fourre-tout

“What one believes to be vanity often results from an inferiority complex.” Roger Peyrefitte

Are you vain? Yes? No? Well, let see…

Do you frequently look at yourself in mirrors or display windows in the street? Do you wear clothes according to the weather or to showcase your assets? Do you regularly take selfies?

If you do any of those things, you are vain my friend. You are excessively proud or concerned about your appearance and few people would call this an asset.

In Western art, vanity is often symbolized by a strutting peacock, or in the Bible by the Whore of Babylon, “the Mother of Prostitutes and Abominations of the Earth.”
Ahem… That sounds a little excessive to me…

Most women are generally concerned about their appearance and try to emphasize what they believe to be their best assets. Which sometimes leads to laughable situations.

Every winter you can spot young women, who regardless of the weather are exposing their midriff. In July maybe, in December it is a little more difficult to fathom. Do they have a particularly interesting navel or are they promoting some new kind of a diet?

Guys on the other hand (after shelling out big bucks and spending countless hours in gyms) like to show what they paid for: an impressive muscularity. And they display this awe-inspiring brawn in skimpy Stringer Tank Tops.

Some men also sport some peculiar hairdos that like magnets attract and distract. It might be a way to draw attention away from more pressing problems.

Vanity is a monkey on anybody’s back. It prevents many people to be taken seriously. Applying for a job with outrageous make-up or a ring in your nose might deter prospective employers from giving you a job.

It would be good to remember that “the only person allowed to be vain is your boss” … or somebody who was chosen (?) by plebeians to be their ruler.

Cogito, ergo sum

“The only cure against vanity is laughter, and the only fault that is laughable is vanity. Henry Bergson

Alain

“I have the absolute right to pardon myself” is the latest ridiculous statement emanating from the Casa Blanca.
Who would possibly “pardon“ himself? A deity? And isn’t this a blatant admission of guilt?

This is not the first time that a president is subject to delusions. Nixon (with disastrous results) followed the same line of reasoning.

“When the president does it, that means that it is not illegal.” Richard Nixon in an interview with David Frost in 1977 

Could it be possible that power (like the locoweed) produce intoxicating side effects? Psychologists seem to agree.

Emperor Caligula (37–41 AD) after a smooth beginning seemed to lose control of the situation and declared that he was a living god. To the dismay of his entourage, he also planned to make his favorite horse Incitatus a consul. Needless to say that his eccentricities did not end well.

A powerful man (or woman) is always surrounded by acquiescing minions. Fearing for their jobs, none of these flunkies have the nerves to disagree with the big cheese giving him the impression of omnipotence.

This, in turn, reinforces the man’s conviction that when you are in power, you become a godlike figure with unlimited authority and the ability to pardon anybody at will.

He might also be tempted like Mobutu to change his name to “The all-powerful warrior who, because of his endurance and inflexible will to win, goes from conquest to conquest, leaving fire in his wake.”

Zeus (the top God) was always jealous of his authority and did not pardon easily. He could be very vindictive and transform the most powerful man into a toad in the blink of an eye.

Zeus who has been napping for a while could suddenly awaken and chastise the usurper. He could hit the “Fake God” below the belt and leave him penniless… a fate worse than death for a showy operator.

“I am the punishment of God… If you had not committed great sins, God would not have sent a punishment like me upon you.” Genghis Khan.

Sigh…

While POTUS is unconcernedly playing golf in Mar-a-Lago, the world is anxiously scrutinizing the horizon for a sign of the Golden Horde.

Alain

For a kid, age 3 is the age of Columbus, the age of discovery. And just like in Christopher Columbus’ time, when you are 3 there is a world to discover… and conquer.

Kids assimilate very early in a process called causality: the relationship between a cause and its effect. They grasp very quickly that when you push a button something exciting will happen. There will be light or sound, images, noise… it will be stimulating and entertaining.

For kids, buttons rule the world and when transplanted in a new environment, their most pressing task is to find those magic knobs.

Last weekend the Nina, the Pinta and the Santa Maria sailed into San Francisco Bay and shortly after our grandson (the Pushbutton Kid) strode in our abode. He is sweet looking but as willful as Captain Henry Morgan.

He is like quicksilver: he moves rapidly, and it is difficult to hold or contain him. It is almost impossible to control his every move 24 hours a day. He is only quiet when engaged in a questionable endeavor or taking a nap.

You might not realize it, but a modern home is brimming with buttons. They are everywhere. On walls, on objects, on remote controls… there are buttons on toasters, coffee makers, mixers, surge protectors, electric fans, phones, thermostats, printers, routers… and all of them have to be tested at least once.

The effects of his actions might not be immediately felt, but later on, you wonder why a few devices that were working perfectly well in the morning, suddenly refuse to function in the afternoon… all at the same time. Any Criminal Investigative Unit would find the kid’s DNAs all over the place.

The key to distracting him from unsanctioned behavior is to show him something even more exciting than launching ICBM’s. And this activity turned out to be a kite-flying session.

We went to an open field looking for an ascending current of air. After a few attempts, the wind caught the kite’s sail and sent it aloft. As the kite’s tail fluttered wildly, the pushbutton kid couldn’t contain his excitement and jumped up and down like a fired up young goat.

Kids can be a handful, but they are so endearing that it is almost impossible not to love them.

“Having a two-year-old is like having a blender that you don’t have the top for.” ~Jerry Seinfeld

The key to getting along with them is to engage them and find as quickly as possible where the missing blender top is located.

Alain