Hot and cold

What do you do when your mate is afflicted by a disorder known as “the hotties”? The symptoms: she is getting uncomfortably hot when I am shivering, and insists on keeping all windows open, regardless of the weather conditions. It has been a Homeric struggle between the Bushwoman and the Eskimo.

Would you believe that she is also prone to frolic “au naturel” when I am quivering in flannel shirts and long johns? Well, Your Honor, this is my predicament… my Way of the Cross… and I hope that you will show some sympathy for my kettle of fish.

There can be a snowstorm or a blizzard raging outside, and she will still insist on letting some “fresh air” in. Her internal thermostat is obviously out of kilter and needs to be fixed… But she does not think so. She would rather believe that I am a weakling who needs to be toughened up… and molded into her own image.

Well, my friends, I’ll have you know that I am no namby-pamby and capable of extraordinary feats. My extreme modesty prevents me from enumerating all my past accomplishments here, but take my storyteller word for it.

It is said that opposites attract, and that’s probably what happened to us. She is hot and I am cool, and we both agreed to disagree on that subject. But attraction has its limits… especially in the hotness department. The question is “Can a hot lady be cool?”

Thinking of it, this might be the wrong way to express my concerns since hot babes usually parade in micro-bikinis. The problem is that they are hot and cool at the same time. It is very confusing for men, especially for a slow-witted guy like me.

To my defense, I should also say that I was born and raised in a temperate, civilized, climate… not in some desolate snow-covered acres where the temperature hovers between 26 and 16 degrees in winter. When you are used to live in freezing climate, you are naturally hot anywhere else…

“I don’t like to commit myself about heaven and hell – you see, I have friends in both places.” ~ Mark Twain

 Like Mark Twain, I am sure that I also have friends in both places. Probaly more in Hell… But since I am always cold, Hell might be more tolerable to me; for her though, the heat is going to be “hellish”. And I don’t think that you can haggle with the Prince of Darkness…

I understand that Hell might be a bit uncomfortable, but socially speaking, you meet much more interesting people there than among the stuck-up do-gooders of Heaven.

That’s all for today folks. I hope that you empathize with my predicament and side with me regarding this hot issue.


PS: I discovered a few lost photos on my little Canon camera. Check the last event to see them.

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