Things to do during the blitz

As the San Quentin’s lodgers can testify, forced confinement can be tedious. You suddenly have too much time on your hands and you are starting to go bananas.

Not only that! Due to house arrest, your roommates (wife, husband, kids, lover) now easily aggravate you and you have no place/pub to go to cool off.

Before you commit any kind of parricide, I will present you with a few occupations that you could use while serving time.

Tamara’s latest production

When enduring this predicament, the first thing that most people will do is binge-watching. One movie after another. But this can get old fast. There are zillions of flicks out there, yet most of them are stinkers. In desperation I have resorted to watching only European movies; they are generally more realistic than most American offerings.
You could also try some museum virtual visits or read some trashy novels.

The more adventurous could indulge in some (educational) porn watching. Nothing is taboo anymore and this kind of divertissement has become mainstream. Statistics also show that porn viewing (by men and women) has increased significantly since the beginning of the crisis. You might also learn a thing or two.

A big thing on your bucket list could be cleaning a closet and getting rid of old or obsolete items. You will be surprised by the kind of stuff you will discover there.
Also investigate your wardrobe and discard what has been gathering dust for the last 10 years. I am in the process of doing that.

Some people like cooking or baking and this is an excellent time to polish your skills. The smell coming from your kitchen might also soothe the restless creatures pacing in your living room. My wife does it and I don’t bite or scratch anymore… I just growl.

Gardening is also something that could calm your nerves. Tamara likes it and spends a fair amount of time doing dirty things in our backyard. A little dirt never hurts.

You could also write a letter (in longhand) to somebody. When was the last time you did this? I have been using a computer for so long that I am now totally incapable of doing this… On the same vein, you could also start a blog.

Don’t forget to exercise. It boosts your energy and takes your mind off the #%*(%$#@ coronavirus nuisance. If this is not your cup of tea, you can substitute that for sex. But keep at it for at least 30 minutes to build up your cardio.

Last but not least, (this according to Christine Morier) you could also go outside and howl with your neighbors every night at 8 pm. It will help to alleviate your anxiety and make you feel better. It works wonders in Denver Colorado.

I hope that my suggestions have been helpful and will assist you in weathering that calamity. If you have more useful recommendations, let me know; I will transmit it to the troops.

Virtual kisses and hugs!


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One thought on “Things to do during the blitz”

  1. Well, well done. My suggestion is to do nothing. Just lie on the couch, drink some wine, and wait for the soldiers at the front to win the battle.
    Thank you Alain for your pen and your sword.

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