Au Cochonnet Marin

Forced confinement has driven many people to extremes. They eat too much, drink too much, think too much, sleep too much… They do everything in excess.
My wife is no exception, she cleans like there is no tomorrow. She cannot stay still. The minute she runs out of things to do, she cleans or vacuums something. Furniture, floors, walls, toilets, sinks, clothes…
It is a bizarre, slightly scary obsession… probably born from stress.

“My theory on housework is, if the item does not multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be.” Erma Bombeck

I am not big on cleaning. Like most men, I adhere mostly to Erma Bombeck’s philosophy. If it does not multiply or smell, leave it alone. I have been told many times to never wake up a sleeping dog and I think that this is very good advice.
Don’t wake up sleeping dust either, it might jump at you.

And besides I have a cat (or what resembles a cat); it is her job to catch anything moving or crawling. She has nothing else to do and taking bugs captive is the least I ask her to do. But contrarily to my hyperactive wife, the beast does very little else. Under the pretense of meditating, she skirts her duties and mostly snoozes.

In my book, doing anything in excess is bad. I think that it says so somewhere in the Bible. Thou shall not overdo it… and if it is not there, it ought to be.

Since she stopped working a few months ago, my wife has been like a lion in a cage… Pacing and cleaning…cleaning and pacing.
She might be overcompensating for my lack of enthusiasm for swabbing or polishing. After all, I am retired. My new job formally proscribes me to do anything that might upset me.

But don’t think for a minute that I am not doing any cleaning at all… At least twice a week, I shave and empty the trash. I also occasionally do the dishes and polish my shoes.

When you think of it, “clean” is a five-letter word, which is much more consequential than a four-letter word. You have to handle those with care… like nitroglycerine. Any false move and it might blow in your face.

Fortunately, the cleaner-in-chief has re-enlisted for another tour of duty in her former outfit. This morning she suited up in her field uniform and went back to her barracks.
God speed my dear.

So, I am glad to report that everything is now (temporarily) quiet on the Western front.

Alain

A tornado is a mobile, destructive vortex of violently rotating winds often having the appearance… of a 5-year-old little boy

These youngsters look cute and innocent, but don’t be fooled… They are fallen angels; angels who were expelled from heaven. This says it all.

Early on in life, wise people realize that some things are better enjoyed from a distance. In the Yellowstone National Park for instance, some visitors seeking unusual photo opportunities often ignore that advice. They come very close to the animals… forgetting that these peaceful looking beasts are wild.

Considering that the average weight of a male human being is around 170 pounds, and that a male buffalo can be up to 2,000 pounds, you would think that it would be prudent to keep a safe distance from it. But visitors cannot resist the attraction of the beasts; they come too close. They forget that an annoyed bison could easily toss any interloper up to 10 feet in the air.

In a certain way, a 40 pounds little boy can be like a bison. It is safer to enjoy him from a distance. But small children and animals are so darn appealing, that it is very difficult to avoid being pulled in their spellbinding orbit.

Grandparents whose immunity system has already been weakened with age are especially vulnerable to their spell. Despite their best efforts, they find it nearly impossible to say “no” to them.
Little boys are “touche-à-tout” (touch everything). Their insatiable curiosity drives them to touch and often take apart any unusual object, and I have a few of them in my office.

Grand-parents’ dwellings are generally not child-proof and are therefore vulnerable to sudden raids. Articles will suddenly disappear and remain hidden for a while. They will be found a few days later in some unusual places.

Computers can also be very appealing targets. Although many toddlers cannot yet read, today they handle a computer with the dexterity of a NASCAR driver.

“Toddlers take half an hour to get a pair of shoes on but can open 5 apps, delete your photos, and call your boss all within 16 seconds.” ~Internet meme

But you can also learn from children. They will help you to discover how much patience you have in you. And if need be, they will teach you how to remain stoical under duress.

Little boys are made invulnerable by their magical charm. It is impossible not to like them, especially when they give you so much unaffected love.

As a new Goliath, I thought that I could easily defeat little David, but I was mistaken. The little guy won by a mile and I am now totally under his control. I might even need some help to escape his magic embrace.

Beware of little boys. The little scamps will steal your heart and have you eating in the palm of their hands in absolutely no time.

Alain

Many Americans don’t seem to a have a good grip on the concept of freedom. I suspected that much for a long time, and my feeling was finally fully validated last year.

2020 will be remembered as the year of the pandemic, a disease prevalent all over the world. Covid-19 is an insidious enemy, invisible, highly contagious and deadly. It is especially dangerous because, unlike some other diseases, its effects are not immediately seen or felt.

Some slow-witted individuals refuse to believe anything they have not personally experienced. They need to be burned, to believe that fire is dangerous. They claim that this virus is a hoax, and wrapping themselves in the flag of freedom, they reject the wearing of masks and social distancing. Like Nero they continue to party while the city is burning.

These pathetic souls have a twisted and self-centered view of freedom. Freedom does not mean that you are entitled to do absolutely as you please. With freedom comes responsibility, especially when you are part of a community

“America became obsessed with free-dumb: the idea of freedom as the removal of all restraint, the right to harm others, the ability to do anything you please, no matter how destructive, toxic, foolish, or inane.”

These fools not only endanger themselves but contribute to the spread and survivability of the pandemic. They will only grudgingly acknowledge the existence of the virus when lying on a hospital bed, strapped to a ventilator.

Freedom is a fragile, endangered species. It might become extinct if not protected and nurtured. Its guardians must remain vigilant and immediately sanction anyone or any group trying to harm it.

And regrettably, this is what is presently happening. Donald Trump lost the 2020 Presidential election by a wide margin. But instead of abiding by the will of the people, he has been bargaining like a bazaar rug merchant to have the results overturned.

There is no doubt that the soon to be one-term president was inspired by his bosom buddy Vladimir Putin. The former KGB operative skillfully engineered a scheme that will keep in power until 2036. Trump is fortunately too obtuse to be equally successful.

But there is nothing more dangerous than a spurned lover. Being rejected by anybody is hurtful, but being repudiated by millions must be intolerable… especially by a narcissistic individual. And murderous violence is usually the answer.

What happened in Washington  on January 6 was no accident. With the silent complicity of his Republican minions, Donald Trump’s attempted coup had been planned for weeks…  Its violence even shocked the president’s hardcore allies who are now running for cover.

NOBODY is above the law. Citizen Trump must be held responsible for the physical damage inflicted on the Capitol and on the American psyche. He must pay a heavy price for the chaos and the dangerous instability that he has created during his capricious tenure. This spoiled brat must be spanked, energetically!

Freedom got a small reprieve, but it is not safe. We must remain vigilant and guard against dangerous populists… and as demonstrated on January 6, they are legions in this disjointed country of ours.

Alain