Pravda

“Better to be slapped with the truth than kissed with a lie.”
Russian proverb

Pravda (the Truth) has many brothers and sisters, but strangely enough they don’t seem to be related. They bear the same name but they often don’t look or sound alike.
How could that be?

It might be because the French truth (la Vérité), the German truth (die Wahrheit), the American Truth, the Arabic truth and many relatives of this extended family are on barely speaking terms. They don’t believe their crumby relatives.
This kind of things happens in many families.

First of all, what is the definition of truth?
It seems that this word has many different interpretations.
“Conform to fact or actuality”
“The real facts about something”
“A verified or indisputable fact”
Hum…

Then, where do we get the Truth?
In the olden days we found it in newspapers.
My own mother often said, “If it is in the newspaper, it has to be the truth”.
Hum again…

Nowadays, fewer people read newspapers and many get their facts from television or the Internet.
They in turn get their facts from reporters, and reporters  can be highly opinionated.
Depending on where they stand during a confrontation, they can report the same event in a widely different manner. But they always tell the truth don’t they, because they were there!

The truth is also conditioned by your environment.
If you are born into a Jewish family, your truth will be different from the truth of an Arab family.
Similarly if you are black, your truth will be different from a white family.

Truth is very pliable. That’s why people love it so much. Like plastic explosive, it can be molded into all kinds of different shapes and blow up those heathens who don’t believe your particular truth.

TruthBut in spite of its shortcomings, truth still has many adherents.
All the world leaders profess to be fond of it
They have said one time or the other:
“You must believe what I say, for I alone am in possession of the truth”
“Those who do not believe are our enemies and must be treated accordingly”
“Alternate viewpoints must be eradicated. No dissension can be tolerated. Nothing can be allowed to stand in the way of the truth”

It is evident that these people like the truth!

Ahmadinejad denied that the Holocaust ever occurred. That’s his truth!
His successor Hassan Rouhani while acknowledging that some nasty business might have occurred in Europe during WWII is a “moderate Holocaust denier”. He is not sure where the truth is.

The 9/11 Truth movement asserted that George W. Bush deliberately allowed the attack on the World Trade Center towers to happen. That’s their truth.

The Creationists don’t believe in the Big Bang. It is not their truth.

The Government is not telling us what they know about UFO’s.
Naughty boys…

Truth is like beer. Bitter at first, but eventually drinkable.
After a while one becomes accustomed to swallow all kinds of truths  without batting an eyelash.
And that’s what leaders are aiming for.

Getting close and flirting with the truth is exciting but also inherently dangerous.
Some rival truth lovers might become jealous and decide to eliminate somebody preaching an incorrect brand of truth.

Personally I don’t believe that Truth exists.
Just like Paradise, I believe that the Big T is a myth created by zealots.
Like Elvis it is seen and heard everywhere, but nobody can tell for sure who the real McCoy is.

Isn’t it the truth?

Alain La Foudre

 

Slowpokes

I will be the first to admit it, I am not patient.
I don’t like to wait. It is a waste of time, and time is a luxury that should be better spent doing something preferably immoral.
I don’t like to wait especially when there are no obvious reasons for doing so.

rondsdecuirVery often, the holdup is created by some pen pusher’s laziness or worse, incompetence, and nobody should be penalized for that.

My motto has always been: lead or get out of the way.

This is especially true on the freeway.
Nothing bugs me more than a slowpoke lollygagging at 60 miles per hour in the fast lane.
In Europe the aptly named “fast lane” is only for passing. You pass a car and you immediately swing to the right to clear the way. That’s common courtesy.
If you don’t, people will start flashing their headlights and honk relentlessly until you get out of the way.

In America, when the posted speed limit is 65 mph some people feel that as long as they are traveling at that speed, they are entitled to stay in that lane.
Yo, not so bitch! (I cannot help speaking like Jesse Pinkman).
If you are a certified slowpoke, you belong to the extreme right lane. And even there you could (and should) be tagged for impeding traffic.

On German Autobahns generally speaking there is no speed limit. The driver may drive as fast as he can as long as he is in full control of the vehicle.

I was once on such a freeway driving a rented car. Just for kicks, I decided to speed up to see how fast I would dare to go.
I was suddenly going around 90 mph in the fast lane and feeling pretty cocky about it.
I glanced at my rearview mirror (something that you should always do) and behind me I saw a car fast approaching. Judging by my own speed, this car must have been traveling at around 120 mph. It looked like a flying panzer ready to blast anything in its path.
I immediately swung to the right to clear the way for that homicidal maniac.

a-strangelove_0When driving on German freeways some people start feeling like Dr. Strangelove. Their right foot acquires a mind of its own and can barely be controlled.
They sometimes feel like shouting “Zu Befehl Mein Führer” when their right foot crushes the accelerator.

But I digress…

The best way to deal with slowpokes is to give them a taste of their own medicine.
Fight fire with fire.

If somebody ever made you wait unnecessarily, return the favor and the first chance you get, keep the miscreant twisting in the wind for a long time.
Procrastinate, delay, postpone, defer until he cries uncle and swear on a stack of pétanque bibles to never make you wait again.

If he persists being disrespectful, feel free to drop him/her from your BFF (Best Friend Forever) list without further ado.

“I should learn patience, it’s a shame there’s no time for that.”
Maija Haavisto, The Atlas Moth

Alain La Foudre

 

Breaking Bad

Like millions of Americans I am now suffering from post-withdrawal syndrome.
A sense of loss, discomfort, that occurs after withdrawal from alcohol, opiates or watching Breaking Bad.

After weeks of following the saga of Walter White, I feel an acute sense of loss after the series concluded on September 29, 2013.
My main frustration though stems from the fact that I am not privy to what ultimately happened to all the characters, and who will live and who will die.

Netflix has not yet released the last six episodes of the show and I don’t know when they will. Therefore my extreme annoyance.

Breaking bad (in the American Southwest parlance) means to turn against the system, defy authority and engage in criminal activities.
In the Netflix television series it tells the story of fallen angel Walter White, mild-mannered high school chemistry teacher turned methamphetamine dealer.

The fascination (should I say addiction?) with this show started innocently enough.
Utterly disgusted by the amount of commercials shown on television stations, I looked for an alternative to this endless misery and found refuge in Netflix.
Netflix is commercial free and this alone is worth the modest monthly fee that you pay to watch their offerings.

A few weeks after my wife started watching it, and despite some misgivings, I began to monitor Breaking Bad and soon became addicted to it.

Walter WhiteIn a few words, Breaking Bad tells the story of Walter White aka Heisenberg, a chemistry teacher living in Albuquerque, New Mexico.
Walter is financially squeezed and at the beginning of the show he is shown working after-hours at a carwash to make ends meet.

After being diagnosed with lung cancer and told that he has at most two years to live, Walt (using his chemistry knowledge) “breaks bad” and resolves to manufacture amphetamine (“blue meth”) to ensure his family’s financial security after he dies.

The story basically tells the story of an ordinary man who inexorably turned to cold-blooded killer. It is gradual, for Walter originally is a decent, principled man. But little by little he starts getting delusions of grandeur, becomes greedy and despite the danger and his wife’s pleas he refuses to quit the business.

My purpose here is not to tell you the entire story, but to let you know why America became so enamored with Breaking Bad.
Little by little we become involved with all the characters and long to know the ultimate fate of Walter, Skyler, Jesse (Bitch) Pinkman, Hank and Saul (Call Saul).

I won’t tell you since I don’t know myself, but stay tuned, I might be able to shed some light on this story later on.

As Jesse Pinkman would say: yo, later bitch!

Alain La Foudre