Au Cochonnet Marin

Good morning America… and welcome to another mass shooting!

By now, the country has sadly become accustomed (almost desensitized) to such senseless violence and even though news organizations pretend to be shocked, they are not doing much to stem this kind of barbarity.
They will report every shooting with relish but won’t campaign against restricting the flow of arms.
The sacred Second Amendment you know, and (mostly) the fear of ruffling some feathers.

No matter what the carnage, American Sunday warriors continue to cling to weapons like Christians to crucifixes.
But crucifixes have never prevented anybody from becoming shooting ducks and gun owners are not immune to random shootings either.
Disgruntled employees or resentful lovers have absolutely no qualms about shooting crucifix bearers and guns lovers alike.
And there are plenty of copycats waiting in the wings…

There is no denying that urban life today has become a dangerous environment, and sometimes people need to protect themselves against deranged individuals.
But to defend yourself you don’t need assault weapons.
Assault weapons are meant to “assault” and not to defend.

In the latest carnage, the killer was armed with an AR-15 assault rifle. Such weapons come equipped with 20 or 30 round staggered-column magazines and can be purchased rather easily.
And this was the case for Aaron Alexis who in spite of known mental problems was able to buy this weapon very easily.

Most people don’t advocate the total banishment of firearms in America, but a tighter control of selling and buying procedures would be a welcome start.

Maybe after the Washington Navy Yard massacre, lawmakers will see the light and have the courage (I doubt it) to do something about it.

If they don’t, very soon children and adults alike will have to wear helmets and bulletproof vests before venturing outside their homes.

Is this something that you would like to see in the future?
Not me!

Alain La Foudre

Erratum: According to the latest news, the shooter was not carrying an AR-15 but a shotgun

 

I have been known to rant and rave about many things and many people, but today I come here not to bury but to praise Caesar.

Our pétanque club is manned by volunteers and unbeknownst to many they often work long hours in the background to make things happen.

Many people for instance come to our picnics and find it natural to find everything “ready to eat”. And they never give it a second thought.
But a picnic for 60 to 70 people is a huge undertaking requiring a lot of planning and preparation.
And this job is done by a handful of (unpaid) volunteers.

Our club, unlike a business organization, never rewards its workers in any form. They don’t even get a pat on the back for a job well done.
That’s why I always try to single out people who contributed to the welfare of our club.

Lately, it has come to my attention that Claudie Chourré is going to leave the Board of Directors at the end of the year.
It is a crying shame and we are sorely going to miss her, for Claudie is one of the oldest Board Member and one of the hardest workers in our club.
In the Soviet Union she would have been known as a  Stakhanovite, an overachiever, and she would certainly have been given some medal.
But in our organization, nada!

Unlike some lesser figures she never blows her horn and that’s why I feel compelled to be her personal horn blower.

Claudie was born in Southwest France, in the province of Bearn located at the feet of the Pyrenees Mountains.
She is from the same area and the same hearty bread as d’Artagnan, the beloved hero of Alexandre Dumas’s Three Musketeers.

She came to the United States around 1962 and along with husband Jean, she worked hard to be a success, and that she did.
She is now surrounded by a large loving family of children and grandchildren.

The club is going to lose a lot when she retires and if I could, I would personally kiss her on both cheeks and award her the “Médaille d’honneur du travail” and “honi soit qui mal y pense” the Order of the Garter.
She bloody well deserves it!

Next time you see Claudie, give a big hug and be sure to let her know how much you appreciate the countless hours that she devoted to our club.

Alain la Foudre

 

I am not a spring chicken anymore, but I still can match wits with anybody, regardless of age.
The aging process might affect your physical capabilities but it should not prevent you from remaining intellectually active.

As an aging bloke, nothing annoys me more than the sight of shuffling, slow-witted old geezers.
Some, due to infirmities cannot help it of course, but to me it is a question of mind over matter.

It should not take (regardless of age) five minutes to find something in your wallet, or another five minutes to laboriously write a check (arghh) at the supermarket.

When you are aging, you should not let technology pass you by either.
If you do, it is an admission of early decline.
It is when you let your grandchild shows you how things work that you abdicate your role of a respected adult.
My old friend Jack Rosenstein learned how to use a computer when he was well into his eighties, and I admired him for it.
It is imperative to get your little grey cells off the couch and submit them to a daily regimen of mental gymnastic to keep them from getting fat and lazy.

In my book, you should never let a whippersnapper get the upper hand either.
Don’t let a kid know that he is better informed than you are.
If you don’t know the answer to some question, stonewall or lie with confidence, but don’t lose face.
No matter what the circumstances, keep a stiff upper lip and a zipped up fly.
They work hand in hand.

Whenever you can, pull a Jack Palance stunt.
On Oscar night, on March 30, 1992, Jack Palance (aged 73) showed his much younger co-star (Billy Crystal) who was the boss.
Upon receiving his Oscar for best supporting actor and addressing the crowd, he said, “I crap bigger than him”.
And to prove his point, he started to do pushups, and one-armed pushups to boot.
That’s my kind of old dude.

Whenever challenged by a younger know-it-all, dare him to do pushups (physical or mental) and be sure to tell him/her regardless of the results: “I crap bigger than you”.

In my own backyard (Marin County), the best example of my convictions is Hagop (Jacques) Sarafian.
At close to 91, he is as sharp as a tack and still shooting unbelievable “carreaux”.
He is a shining example of what we should all be striving to achieve.

Shahnour Vaghenag Aznavourian (better known as Charles Aznavour) is of the same mold.
At 89 he is still touring and singing.

What’s the secret of these Armenian dudes anyway?
Yogurt? Dzhash?
I’d like to know.

La Foudre