Category: Fourre-tout

It is hot and it seems to be an opportune time for nymphets of all creeds to dress skimpily… and make tongues wag.
Modesty is “passé” and the general idea of this seasonal ritual seems to be “Make them stop and stare.”

I have no problem with this. I am an atheist who has abjured political correctness and I am entitled to think and say anything I want. This also gives me license to check out any woman without fearing any divine retribution.

“Just because I’m flaunting it doesn’t mean you can stare for hours on end. A polite ogle is appreciated and suitable for a flaunt. Slobbering is not.” Katie MacAlister

Absolutely! But it is not always easy. Despite your best efforts it is sometimes difficult to look away… the flesh is weak, and I have so little willpower.

Life is not fair. I have tried for years to make you aware of this.
Pretty girls can wear any ridiculous outfit and still look cute. Girls deviating from the classical canons of beauty can’t. If they do, they will trigger mockery.

Every girl likes to be noticed… To look hot.  I understand that. But she should not be singled out for the wrong reasons.
All living creature tries to look their best. But as a woman, you won’t look your best if you pick the wrong outfit. If Beyoncé, Taylor Swift or Cristiano Ronaldo look good in a tight-fitting costume, it does not mean that you will also look smashing while wearing the same garb.

Your clothes should be tight enough to show you’re a woman, but loose enough to show you’re a lady. Marilyn Monroe

Anybody has the right to wear anything they please, but this does not mean that you should. Baryshnikov looks good in dancing tights, but I would look absolutely ridiculous in yoga pants… and I know it. Consequently, given the less than perfect shape of my anatomy, I refrain from wearing what looks good on ballet dancers.

Generally speaking, when glancing at people, you are not looking at the body itself, but at the way it is packaged. A gift will always look better when wrapped with pretty paper, and so will you.
To look your best, dress according to your body shape, and not by what you see in glamour magazines.

“Sexy is not always about boobs or butts. It is the way you walk, the way you talk and the way you think.”

Amen!

Alain

“Everything you say can and will be used against you.”

I usually choose dinner guests based on their fun factor, wit, erudition or exoticism. I want to be entertained, have fun, temporarily forget about my concerns.

Some people have a different criteria. They like to rub elbows with the rich and powerful… maybe in the hope that these folks’ good fortune will rub off on them.
They like to bathe in an atmosphere scented with might and money.

The affluent people, unfortunately, tend to boast, to swagger. “I own a boat, a private island, a racing stable, I just purchased two tickets to outer space…”

If you mention this in passing and never talk about it again, you might be forgiven. But if you keep crudely insisting on your wealth, or your IQ, you become an ass, a nuisance subject to banishment. Greenland maybe…

I would never invite again somebody who would  say:

“I’m proud of my net worth; I’ve done an amazing job…The total is $8,737,540,000 USD. I’m not doing that to brag, because you know what, I don’t have to brag.”

“I’m, like, a smart person. I don’t have to be told the same thing in the same words every single day.”

“My two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart…”

Aargh… I am going to barf.

The traditional list of capital sins is: pride, avarice,lust, envy, gluttony, anger, and sloth. Vanity is missing from that record and should also be added to that lot.
And for good measure: complacency, conceit, egotism, pride, self-admiration, self-congratulation, self-glory, self-love, smugness, swelling head…

There is an old saying that goes: “Every ass loves to hear himself bray.”
I truly like donkeys, but when they bray too loudly, they upset me.

When you don’t respect somebody, you oust him/her from your environment.
Fortunately, we are still a (fragile) democracy and there is a legal procedure to preserve it. Be sure to get involved in the electoral process and vote to protect that democracy.

Alain

Super this, super that… Aren’t you tired of all these superlatives?

It might sound peculiar, but some words are starting to really bug me. They irritate me because they have been overused and have lost their meaning.

If you eat caviar every day, it will quickly lose its original appeal and become dull, unexciting. The same fate applies to words. Some of the terms on my “shunning” list are: awesome, devastated, outraged, disrespected, whatever, star, super…

Nowadays everything is “awesome” and everybody has been “devastated” by one thing or the other. I cannot stand it anymore.
America, a nation that used to be on the cutting edge of just about everything, has been reduced to a land of parrots and copycats. “What monkey see, monkey do.”Pathetic!

Super, originally meant “above” or “over” expressing the highest degree of quality. But now, nothing is plain or ordinary anymore. Everything is super… something.

If an actress gets a bit part in a movie, she instantly becomes a “superstar”. If a young girl walks the catwalk a few times, she is a “supermodel”. The little grocery store around the corner is now a supermarket.

Basta! Enough! We need to save our vocabulary from pollution.
Fopdoodle (a stupid fellow), raggabrash (a disorganized or grubby person), flibbertigibbet (excessive talkative person), mafflard (blundering fool), muckspout (someone who uses a lot of cursing) are now insults in disuse.

These words were probably cool and popular at one time, but through overuse they became annoying and  obsolete.

So, for crying out loud, stop being outraged or devastated. Don’t parrot and repeat mechanically whatever you heard somewhere. Be indignant, furious, full of rage… anything but outraged.

Use your imagination. If need be, rehearse at home what you would like to say to your rivals or your loved ones. Be original or hold your tongue for chrissake!

In conclusion:

Watch your mouth. Don’t pollute. Don’t abuse anything, including weed, French fries and superlatives.

Abuse of words has been the great instrument of sophistry and chicanery, of party, faction, and division of society. John Adams

Merci beaucoup for your attention.

 Alain

A woman tells her doctor, ‘I’ve got a bad back.’
The doctor says, ‘It’s old age.’
The woman says, ‘I want a second opinion.’
The doctor says: ‘Okay – you’re ugly as well.’ – Tommy Coope