In Donald Trump Administration, there will be no bullshit! Bobby Knight.
Blimey!
“ I alone can fix it”
That’s what President Elect Donald Trump repeatedly told his supporters during his slash and burn campaign.
Many people didn’t believe this and many still don’t, but the Pompadoured Wonder now has a unique opportunity to prove his detractors wrong.
He, just like mighty Hercules, will have to perform twelve incredible feats (The Twelve Labors of Trump) to win the hearts and minds of all Americans.
If you don’t quite remember what Hercules Labors were, you can consult GreekMythology.com
This document describes Hercules as follows:
“Offsetting his strength was a noticeable lack of intelligence or wisdom. Once, when the temperature was very high, he pulled his bow out and threatened to shoot at the sun.
While his friend and cousin Theseus ruled Athens, Heracles had trouble ruling himself. His pride was easily offended. He took up grudges easily and never forgot them.”
Based on Hercules accomplishments, here are Donald Trump’s challenges:
‘Build a wall’ — and make Mexico pay for it
Hercules did not built a wall, but it was not in his nature to build.
Donald who claims to be a builder said he would do it and make Mexico pay for it. Qué mierda!
Hercules cleaned the Augean Stables
“Thousands of cows lived in the stables belonging to King Augeas. They had not been cleaned in 30 years, but Hercules was told to clean them completely in a single day. To do so he made two rivers bend so that they flowed into the stables, sweeping out the filth.”
Donald will “drain the swamp” in Washington and deport an estimated 11 million unauthorised Mexican immigrants and their children.
He will do it in a “very nice way”.
Hercules took the Girdle of the Amazon Queen Hippolyte
“Hercules went to the land of the Amazons, where the queen welcomed him and agreed to give him her girdle for Eurystheus’s daughter. But Hera spread the rumor that Hercules came as an enemy. In the end he had to conquer the Amazons and steal the golden belt.”
Donald will steal senator Elizabeth Warren’s girdle.
Hercules took the Golden Apples of the Hesperides
Donald will increase tariffs on Chinese imports to 45 per cent and steal their golden kumquats.
More worryingly, Donald Trump also vowed to:
- Fully repeal Obamacare’ and replace it with an alternative.
- It now looks like he is already vacillating on that issue.
- Stop the government dictating what types of firearms “good, honest people” are allowed to own.
Do you need a machine gun to defend your min-fort? - Reduce gun violence by empowering law-abiding gun owners to defend themselves.
Against whom? - Renegotiate America’s role in the UN global climate accord struck in Paris last year.
“The concept of global warming was created by and for the Chinese in order to make U.S. manufacturing non-competitive.” - Appoint a right-wing Supreme Court JusticeThis says it all.
This says it all.
It took Hercules 12 years to accomplish his feats. How fast can Donald do it and how much time does he have before the proverbial sand gets into the machine?
The proof is in the pudding Mr. President-elect. America and The World are keenly watching.
Alain