It happens with a tiresome regularity.
A woman’s precarious chest scaffolding gives way, and out pops a boob.
This happened on New Year’s Eve to voluptuous Colombian star Sofia Margarita Vergara.
Malfunction, malfunction, screamed the delighted entourage. The victim of the accident looked appropriately embarrassed and, surrounded by bodyguards, beat a hasty retreat. But not before the paparazzi laying in wait took a few good shots.
If they didn’t, I believe that another unfortunate malfunction could be arranged.
Malfunctions are accidents waiting to happen and are often engineered by the “victims” or their handlers. And in showbiz there is not such thing as bad publicity.
The Wardrobe Malfunction Victims (they are always women) often wear gravity-defying outfits, and the odds are that eventually gravity will prevail.
It is to be noted that malfunctions always happen to well-endowed celebrities, and that it is often the quickest way to the evening news or the next movie contract.
Malfunctions seldom happen to male celebrities though. I wonder why?
Personally I wish that it would happen more frequently to our smug, self-serving male politicians.
These impotent SOB’s are permanently holding the country hostage and love nothing better than to parade in front of the cameras to declare that no deal can be reached with the opposition.
These people deserve a real Wardrobe Malfunction.
I wish that it would happen in particular to the smug, permanently tanned Sartorial Prince of the Republican Party.
I would be delighted to see him inadvertently drop his pants during a press conference and flee for cover under the flashes of the paparazzi.
This is the kind of malfunction I would not mind seeing or hearing about. It would truly make my day.
In France they say that ridicule kills and I wish it did. This way we could replace the entire Congress and House of Representatives with one-term Doers instead of entrenched, self-serving, do-nothing Talkers.