Au Cochonnet Marin

I don’t know if you have noticed, but it is now fairly common in today’s movies to show various characters sitting in the loo.

What was long considered to be a private affair, is now shown in CinemaScope to thousands of spectators. I realize that the film director (probably a cinema-verité lover) wants to show realism, but is this really necessary? Personally, when I am in the loo, I  prefer privacy; it is more conducive to the business at hand.

By the way, do not confuse “loo” with the French word “loup”. They are “homophones” and despite their different spelling, they are pronounced totally the same way. But the catch is that they have an entirely different meaning. To be specific, the French word “loup” (pronounced exactly as loo) means “wolf”, and it is widely used in many popular expressions such as:

 Avoir une faim de loup : To be as hungry as a wolf
Se jeter dans la gueule du loup : To jump into the wolf’s mouth
Crier au Loup: To cry Wolf
Hurler avec les loups: To howl with the wolves
Être connu comme le loup blanc : To be known as the white wolf
To be known by everybody.
L’homme est un loup pour l’homme : Man is a wolf to man
Faire entrer le loup dans la bergerie : To let the wolf in the sheepfold
Elle a vu le loup: She has seen the wolf (she lost her innocence)

So, when a UK citizen comes to France and asks “où est le loo?” (where is the loo/loup?)  he might get some rather surprising looks.

French (as well as English) is ripe with homophones and they can be rather confusing to a foreigner. But they are fun to play with, such as in the following sentence:

La mère du maire habite à côté de la mer. (The mother of the mayor lives next to the sea.)

La mer — the sea
Le maire/ la maire — the mayor
La mère — the mother

That is all for now…

Alain

 PS:  A reminder that you can read this text in French, German, Spanish and Russian by clicking on “Translate”.

Let me start by reiterating that life is not fair. It is utterly unfair. And this bias starts the minute that you are born. In the name of social justice, and to nip this inequity in the bud, I suggest that infants start a movement to fight this blatant injustice….

In our society, natural body assets are primordial, as they are going to play a big part in your life. The shape of your eyes, your nose, your ears, your chin, etc. are going to be determining factors. If you are lucky, you will get a decent face; if you are not and look rather odd, this is the first strike against you. And there is nothing (or little) that you can do about it.

As you grow up, your body shape is going to become consequential. You will need to be well-proportioned… not too tall, not too short, not too fat. And again, there is not much that you can do about it. It has been pre-ordained, and your genes will decide for you.

A woman will start worrying about her body probably earlier than a man. In our ever-evolving culture, curves (butts and boobs) have become highly prized goods and if lacking in this area, many women will feel distressed.

On just about any social media, young women are posting selfies to flaunt their curves. They believe that their look is their biggest selling point, and they are trying to maximize it. But they are misguided. It is more important to be attractive on the inside than on the outside.

“You can’t really invest in your looks like your only ‘thing’ because it is a depreciating asset. Put your money, put your effort, invest in your brain and talent which will appreciate and get better as you get older.” Rashida Jones

 If you are not particularly attractive, you will need to be more resourceful. Fortunately, your brain is there to help. It is a tremendously powerful tool that will (most of the time) trump natural body assets. Beauty is ephemeral (a depreciating asset), but a brain will continue to develop and pay interest throughout a lifetime.

Physically unattractive people always have to try harder and are usually more resilient than good-looking ones. But looks are not everything… Many homely people did very well despite their less than perfect appearance. Among them Woody Allen, Bill Gates, Mahatma Gandhi, Golda Meir, Mick Jagger, Stephen King, Camilla Parker-Bowles…

Natural body assets are valuable, but they don’t define a person. The brain and the heart do. If you are fortunate to have both, without any doubt, you are a winner.

Only when our clever brain and our human heart work together in harmony can we achieve our full potential. Jane Goodall

Alain

Let’s talk about “bounce rate” for a few minutes if you don’t mind. When I check my blog’s statistics (yes, I do) I usually pay attention to what is known as the “bounce rate”.

“Bounce Rate is defined as the percentage of visitors that leave a webpage without taking an action, such as clicking on a link, filling out a form, or making a purchase.”

 In other words, the Bounce Rate measures the degree of interest and the involvement of your readers. A high bounce rate signifies that the reader is mildly interested in what you wrote, or that the content is not relevant to him. He/she reads and leaves quickly without taking any action. By the same token, a low bounce rate means that the reader is attentive, has clicked on some links, or left a comment. This is very gratifying for the author!

This is important because while writing is a satisfying occupation, is also a time-consuming process. It usually takes a few hours (after many, many edits) to put a little story together, and much more time, if I also attach a photo album.

I of course enjoy doing this, but at the same time, I would welcome some feedback once in a while. Even my cat, who is a rather aloof individual, appreciates a few strokes from time to time.

“We all need people who will give us feedback. That’s how we improve.” – Bill Gates

So, once you have read my story, help me to improve and minimize the bounce rate by providing me with some feedback. This will assist me to stay relevant, and at the same time, keep a modest view of my own importance.

I know that some people have an extreme fear of hypodermic needles, and similarly, some individuals are loath to provide some feedback. To mollify and invite them to fight this inclination, I might have to offer some interesting incentive…  (an idea still under consideration) … Every comment will be acknowledged and answered.

To write an opinion on this blog, empty your bladder, sit quietly for at least 5 minutes (no music allowed), and click on “Leave a comment” (you can do it with this link) located under the main title, on the top left side of this page. The comment space will appear at the bottom of the page.

Do not procrastinate. Leave a few words (no impropriety allowed) and pat yourself on the back for your good deed. It will bring you good karma, I promise.

Alain

“I can live for two months on a good compliment.” Mark Twain