Au Cochonnet Marin

Nobody likes to talk about death, but I just read an article suggesting that when you are pronounced clinically dead, you still can hear what is being said around you.
Blimey!

“Death just became even more scary: scientists say people are aware they’re dead because their consciousness continues to work after the body has stopped showing signs of life.”

Well, it would be very interesting to hear what people would say if after whispering: “I left a million dollars under…” you took the last train to glory.
The semi-defunct might hear things like Old bastard! Son of a motherless goat! Blundering buffoon! Fopdoodle! Ass dandruff!

As a general rule, I avoid talking ill about people I know. But in the past, I felt that I could speak more candidly about the dead. Not anymore it seems.
Now, for fear of hurting the corpse’s feelings, I will hesitate to say, “No big loss. He was a drunkard and a cheat.” I might be more nuanced in my appreciation.

The world is changing. When I was a young man, I never heard of transgenders; now it seems that they are popping up everywhere. Not That There’s Anything Wrong with That!
People of the same sex didn’t marry. Not That There’s Anything Wrong with That!
Nobody relied on a phone for directions or advice… Not That There’s Anything Wrong with That!

And what about parking? In my heyday parallel parking without power steering was quite a feat. Today a car can park itself… and even converse (and argue) with you.

So a still contemplative dead person would not be that extraordinary after all. Soon, the departed will be communicating with you through Siri.

Hey Siri, tell that dude in shorts to f**k off? He is getting too cheeky for my taste.

Alain

“For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.” Johnny Carson

Life generally speaking is driven by a series of dangling incentives; promises that motivate people to make a greater effort in exchange for monetary rewards.

While I don’t believe in the “carrot and stick” metaphor, I still think that carrots will prompt individuals to try harder at what they are doing.

The success of a pétanque tournament is often measured by its attendance. The promise of monetary gains will persuade players to attend a certain event while bypassing affairs with negligible financial incentive. They don’t have any motivation to drive 50 miles for the eventual reward of just a few bucks.

For many players (like me) this is not an issue. They come to a tournament for fun, for the sheer pleasure of competing with their peers. They know that they have little chance to progress to the finals or even the semi-finals of a tournament. But beating the odds is a powerful incentive and winning a tournament would be plenty a reward; a few additional bucks would just be the icing on the cake.

A select few have a good chance to win and be rewarded with cash. But nothing in life is certain except taxes and death. A few missteps or rugged opposition and the dream is over.
In my opinion, the larger the piñata, the greater the attendance. And that is what a club should strive for, maximum attendance.

This is why I favor the idea of a club always offering topmost financial rewards. The sponsoring club should keep a certain percentage of the purse for maintenance and unexpected expenses but return most of the gross money in cash prizes.

In my experience, “agitare la carota” always works. Dangle cash, and like common piafs attracted by breadcrumbs scores of contestants will show up.

“All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.” Spike Milligan.

Alain

After watching daily broadcasts of the terrifying firestorms engulfing Northern California, I cannot find the words to express my dismay and compassion for all the people affected by this unprecedented catastrophe.

The sheer size of this disaster boggles the mind. According to news channels, over 4000 homes and businesses have been destroyed. Aerial views of the fire areas are eerily reminiscent of photos taken after the bombing of Hiroshima. It is an apocalyptic vision of hell.

My heart goes out to all the people who lost their homes. It is a terrible emotional and financial blow, especially for senior citizens; they might find it more difficult to recover from this heart-rending shock. When you lose your home, you lose a good part of your life and for older folks, the clock is ticking.

And then, you have to find a new place to live while your house is rebuilt. It is going to be very difficult. There is already an acute shortage of housing in this area and it will get worse before it gets better.

Considering the enormity of the task, finding a sufficient number of architects, contractors, and skilled construction workers to do the job is going to be arduous.
Dealing with insurance companies is also going to be laborious and frustrating. A lot of paperwork is going to be involved and proving ownership of a multitude of items will be problematic.

Some pragmatic individuals though have taken this catastrophe in stride. I know for instance of some people who were booked for a vacation. Instead of cancelling and lamenting about their misery, they decided to go ahead and enjoy their getaway. They reasoned that there was not much they could do by staying and they decided to enjoy their vacation before mourning their losses.

In such critical times, family, as well as friends’ ties, is crucial. Moral support and practical assistance help to ease the blow for the unfortunates.

There is no doubt that California will recover. It is one of most dynamic and progressive state in the Union and its politicians are more willing to assist their constituents than anywhere else. No matter what the odds, California will thrive and show the way to the nation again!

However long the night, the dawn will break. African Proverb

Alain