Au Cochonnet Marin

We live in troubled times, and we are in dire need of a unifying subject to bridge an ever-widening political gap. This is why today’s topic is going to be lighter, even frivolous. It deals with an issue that amazingly, Republicans and Democrats might even agree on.

Women who constitute half of the world population could be that link. Lately, their ascendance and influence have been significant, and the world is paying attention.

Men are mostly bland and boring, and not very interesting to look at. In comparison, women are way more attractive and much easier on the eye. They are also considered more astute and more diplomatic than men. So yes, I am partial to women and I hope that someday we will have a woman in the Executive Office.

With time, women’s influence and physical appearance have evolved. They are like chameleons, adept at changing their looks according to circumstances. After numerous metamorphoses, women today favor a new look.

“Today women are expected to be skinny, but not too skinny, with large breasts and a big butt, all while maintaining a flat stomach”.

The center of attention has shifted from breasts (Jane Russell) to the “derrière” (Jennifer Lopez). And women increasingly are seeking plastic surgery to achieve this look.

When asked what they first notice in a woman, many men opt for the lame “beautiful eyes” answer. Maybe, but I doubt it. At 20 feet, it is impossible to tell anybody’s eye color. What you first notice is the silhouette, bust, waist, and a well-rounded ass, a callipygian ass.

Beautiful eyes will never stop traffic and prompt construction workers to whistle. But a shapely butt will. I venture to say that an exceptional ass could even lead to howling. Don’t blame men, they simply cannot help it.  It has something to do with primeval atavism. Women are acutely aware of this and would kill for a shapely derriere.

And yet, until now, the ass (at least in the American culture) has never been as celebrated as the breasts. Why is that? Maybe because some people feel it safer to glorify the Twins for its life-giving properties than the ass for its satanic promises of unearthly lust. I don’t want to take the thunder away from a pair of shapely breasts, but when push comes to shove, the asses have it.

Political correctness or not, I am an unabashed admirer of the feminine derrière… an ass man.
Have mercy, I cannot help it.

Alain

Life is getting more complicated, more challenging every single day. Have you noticed it?

For my part, it seems that my hearing is getting less reliable than it used to be. In my youth I could hear a mouse fart, but not today. It is not terribly bad, but this problem is accentuated by the widespread utilization of masks. The sound coming through is kind of muffled, not as clear as to when unimpeded.

“I hadn’t really noticed that I had a hearing problem. I just thought most people had given up on speaking clearly.” ~ Hal Linden

Then the problem is compounded when the speaker is foreign-born and communicates with an unfamiliar accent. How many times can you decently ask your interlocutor to repeat himself? Two, three, four? If this person is excitable (and packing heat) the situation could easily get out of control.
Life is getting more complicated…

To add to this difficult situation, ubiquitous plastic screens shielding merchants from customers are popping up everywhere. If your hearing is not as sharp as your pet, you are handicapped. I could bring my cat shopping, but she is not very patient or diplomatic. When annoyed, she is quick to unsheathe her claws and get ornery.

The other major complication of modern living is the inordinate use of passwords. Like bedbugs, they infiltrate every facet of your life. You cannot go to the bathroom without entering a password! And we are asked to make them difficult to guess… from a few anodyne characters it jumped to 8, 10, 12, and now 20 digits. What if you urgently need to go to the loo, and cannot remember the impossible password? Is there a derogation for urinating on the kitchen floor?
Life is becoming more complicated…

Some “independent-minded” people refuse to wear masks. Why? I have no idea. Do they really believe that the pandemic (after over 200,000 deaths in the US alone) is a hoax? Are they so enamored of our leader that they believe every single word coming out of his mouth? Or are they just plain half-witted?

I have the feeling that those “mavericks” are the same individuals refusing to follow rules and using the same 4-digit (1234) password on all their cyber transactions.

They cannot help it… Life is becoming too complicated for simple-minded folks.

Alain

The 2020 presidential election is probably going to be the most significant event of your entire life. In a few weeks, you will decide what kind of legacy you are going to leave to your children for many years to come.

You have to choose between an ignorant, immoral bully whose entire life is a lie and a decent, experienced man who already spent 8 years as the nation’s second-in-command executive.
It is a choice between good and evil. A deliberate decision to choose between authoritarianism and liberalism.

In the Presidential elections, you can vote for a man who loves to cozy up with tyrants like Xi Jinping, Kim Jong-un, Vladimir Putin, and Recep Erdogan. Or you can side with somebody who cares about the common man and the environment, and wants to reestablish friendly ties with all our former allies.

All the above autocrats by the way, always outmaneuvered the incumbent and ridiculed him behind his back. The apprentice-sorcerer proved that he is not smart enough to play with the Big (bad) Boys.

After 4 years at the helm, the incumbent demonstrated to be a man unfit to run a country like the United States. He might have some success in a banana republic, but not as a leader of a world-class democracy.

The common man has absolutely nothing to gain by electing a man who has already proved his disdain for him. The famous tax cut heralded by the Republicans was nothing but a giant gift to the ruling class (and the president himself of course). Joe Sixpack got peanuts for his fealty to a dishonorable man.

And then, there is the shocking, purposely downplayed pandemic that cost 200,000 American lives… just to gain some political advantage. How can any decent person side with this self-centered lunatic?

What is at stake in this particular Presidential election, is the future of the United States. It is not difficult to imagine that if reelected, the president could try a Putin-like sleight of hand to remain in power indefinitely. He already mentioned a third term…
Under Putin’s rule, critics (like Alexey Navalny) have to fear for their lives. It would not be any different under an American dictatorship.

If the United States is to remain a free, democratic country, the pompadoured buffoon and his foul-smelling clique of sycophants have got to go.
America is a multicultural society, and everybody ought to be treated equally and fairly. This is not the case today and nothing will change if the present leadership remains in power.

When you go to the polls (or when you mail your ballot), vote for somebody who promised to heal and unite, instead of a notorious rabble-rouser.

Alain