Category: Fourre-tout

“Whoever is without sin among you, let him be the first to cast a stone at her.”

 

The other day around the dinner table politics crept into the conversation.
Somebody said, “I won’t vote for Hillary; she lies”.

She lies? Give me a break.
Of course she lies. Not all the time, but occasionally, like anybody else. I lie, you lie, everybody lies.
Show me a man who doesn’t lie and I will show you a corpse.

And can you imagine for a minute a world without lies?

 

“For people who say they hate being lied to, just start telling them nothing but the pure truth–about everything. That will teach them”
Seth Adam Brown

I don’t condone lies, but I understand their usefulness. Lies are the lubricants that keep the world spinning. Without them we would all kill each other.
And like mushrooms, they come in a great variety. Some are digestible and some are highly poisonous.
Lies can be offensive, defensive, soothing, merciful, compassionate, funny …

“Because everybody lies. It’s part of living in society. Don’t get me wrong-I think it’s necessary. The last thing anyone wants is to live in a society where total honesty prevails. Can you imagine the conversations? You’re short and fat, one person might say, and the other might answer, I know. But you smell bad. It just wouldn’t work.”
Nicholas Sparks

If lies didn’t exist, we would have to invent them.

But there is a big difference between an occasional fibber and a chronic liar.
We can forgive an infrequent fibber but we should not excuse nor believe a compulsive liar.
So yes, Hillary has probably lied a few times. BFD! Don’t we all? Aren’t Cruz or Trump spouting cock-and-bull stories on a daily basis?

When choosing between a seasoned professional and a carnival huckster, I will definitely side with the professional… even if she occasionally errs on the side of inaccuracy.

But winning an election is the easy part. Taming a dysfunctional Congress will really be what separates a woman from the boys.

Alain

“Life is all about Ass. You’re either covering it, laughing it off, kicking it, kissing it, bursting it, or trying to get a piece of it.” 
Unknown Author

  

Every four years American politicians vying for at shot at Pennsylvania Avenue engage in a gigantic ass-kissing contest that is watched with incredulous amazement by the rest of the world.

This League of Extraordinary Gentlemen men dudes (and dudette) shamelessly engages in a bunch of unnatural acts to secure votes.

Wearing plastic smiles, they will mingle with and glad-hand commoners (yuck), kiss drooling babies (gross), eat crappy foods (yech), play checkers, pretend to ride the subway, in short, perform all sorts of deeds that are as flagrantly phony as a three- dollar bill.
They will even try to rope in a reluctant pope to enroll him as a Facebook friend.

As usual, an obscene amount of money is fueling this farce. For money is power. It is an “extra-strength” lubricant that behind the scene can and will unfreeze the most obstinate frozen bolts.
Candidates are not above cajoling, bribing even blackmailing (especially if there is a skeleton dangling in your closet) the so-called “undecided”.

But if victory is achieved, will there be gold at the end of the rainbow for Joe Sixpack and his buddies?
I very much doubt it. Joe and his chums will get bupkes, nada, rien.
Only a few in the immediate entourage of the candidate will be rewarded for their steadfast support.

For when this long humiliating courtship comes to an end, everything changes. It is now the former ass kisser who wants to be the “kissee”.

“I want real loyalty. I want someone who will kiss my ass in Macy’s window, and say it smells like roses.” Lyndon B. Johnson

So, why should we vote for any of these brownnosers?
Because USS America needs somebody at the helm. Somebody preferably presidential looking, reasonable, experienced, pragmatic, not some pathetically laughable, uninformed pompadoured braggadocio.

Demagogues are dangerous fellows. They generally promise what they cannot deliver.
Promise me less, but if possible, give me more. Not the opposite.

Speaking for myself, I cannot trust anybody who blows his own horn harder than famously arrogant (“There are not enough Indians in the world to defeat the Seventh Cavalry”) George Armstrong Custer.

Alain

« Elle était aussi bien de fesses que de face. »
Raymond Queneau

 

On April 17, under a beautiful blue sky, La Pétanque Marinière hosted its annual Lentils & Sausages picnic/tournament.

You might not realize it, but lentils are one of the healthiest dishes on earth.
According to a medical journal, lentils lower cholesterol. They reduce your risk of heart disease. They help prevent constipation and they stabilize your blood sugar. And since it contain virtually not fat, it helps you to lose weight.
Aren’t we a caring bunch?

A light shadow was cast over the tournament following the unexpected demise of René di Maio. A minute of silence was observed but as the poet says:

“Better to die, and sleep the never-waking sleep, than linger on and dare to live when the soul’s life is gone.”

Memories will linger, but life will go on.

Sabine Mattei prepared the lentils (thank you Ma’am) and as usual Cartouche (aka J-C Etallaz) and Antoine Lofaro cooked the sausages. Thank you fellows.

Thirty-six contestants signed up for the tournament.

1. Blaise West, Gus Foucher, Claudie Chourré
2. Alain Efron, Doug Colville, Clea Massiani
3. Bleys Rose, Catlin Woodbury, Joanne Easton
4. Shannon bowman, Joe La Torre, Genevieve Etallaz
5. Francois Moser, Robbie Passemar, Calvert Barron
6. Brigitte Moran, Noel Marcovecchio, Monique Bricca
7. Patrick Vaslet, J-M Poulnot, Eva Lofaro
8. J-c Etallaz, Christine Cragg, Sabine Mattei
9. John Morrison, Charlie Davantes, Liliane Sebban
10. Henry Wessel, Marshall Elliott, Paul Tucker
11. Bernard Passemar, Larry Cragg, Richard Ehrinberger
12. Albert Woodbury, Rob Everett, Tamara Efron

Among the participants, I spotted notorious Rasputina (Tamara), Le Canonnier (Noel), Fillette (Brigitte), le P’tit Suisse (Francois), le Facteur (Jean-Michel), La Bête Noire (Henry), Minette (Genevieve), whimsical La Voleuse (Clea), Pitouf (Paul), Dagobert and Firefly (Bernard).
Most of these troopers did well in the tournament.

We also noticed with pleasure the participation of four young San Franciscans who didn’t hesitate to cross the Bridge to compete on our own turf.
We hope to see them on a regular basis.

After random pairing (due to the diligence of Liv Kraft and Christine Cragg), triplettes were assembled and games (3) started after lunch.

My own team consisting of Doug Colville, Clea Massiani (aka La Voleuse) and myself (La Foudre) lost the first game 7/13. This was just a warming up session.
On our second game, we went down 11/13 but did noticeably better.
On our final meet, after a highly contested game, we were (barely) bested 12/13.
As you can see, we improved with each game and with two additional games we would have definitely crushed the opposition.

While playing I managed to take a few snapshots on the fly. They are not my best work, but I plead extenuating circumstances.

After the dust settled, the final results emerged and they were as follows:

1^st place:  Albert Woodbury, Rob Everett, Tamara Efron             $25/ea
2^nd place: Sabine Mattei, J-C Etallaz, Christine Cragg                        $18/ea
3^rd place: Henry Wessel, Marshall Elliott, Paul Tucker                          $15/ea
4^th place: Brigitte Moran, Noel Marcovecchio, Monique Bricca           $10/ea

Congratulations to the winners, and especially to Rasputina (Tamara) who promised to take me out for dinner with her fabulous winnings.

Until we meet gain, hasta la vida amigos, or as my better-half would say “До скорого!”

Alain la Foudre

PS: To look at photos of this event and listen to the accompanying background music, turn your computer’s sound on, and click on the link “My Photos” located on the right side of this page. For best viewing, go Full Screen.

PS 2: Look at Clea’s gallery:

http://www.bassandreiner.com