Category: Fourre-tout

Being a twin is like being born with a best friend. 
Tricia Marrapodi

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You might have done it your way but regrets some regrets are part of life.

Regardless of what some braggarts are saying everybody has some, sometimes deeply buried in your psyche.
One of mine is the absence of an identical twin brother.

It takes a long time to become BFF with somebody. Can you imagine the fantastic luck of being born with one?

Can you imagine sharing your life with somebody who, regardless of the odds, will always unconditionally be on your side?
Somebody who will scratch your back the minute you feel an itch?
Somebody who will anticipate and fulfill your wishes without ever having to ask?
Somebody who would finish a sentence for you?
Somebody who would never forget your birthday?

Yes, I do miss having a twin brother.

I have had girlfriends, some decent, some so and so, but girlfriends are a light year behind when compared with a twin.
A girlfriend will quarrel with you, betray you, leave you (or vice-versa)… things that are absolutely unimaginable coming from a twin.

For whatever reasons, brothers and sisters are commonly at odds. Twins never.
It might have something to do with spending 9 months together squeezed in very tight quarters. To succeed, you must to cooperate.
A twin is a product made of kryptonite, guaranteed for life and backed by an ironclad policy. It is totally devoid of fine print.

Bonds between a brother or a sister are not made of the same material. Their ties are brittle and they are not rustproof. With time they might fail.

So again, having a twin is a fabulous blessing worth its weight in gold.
And yes, I am jealous and envious. I am wondering if even late in life I could acquire a twin because (as Lord Byron said) “to know true happiness you must share it.”

So just be aware that I am in the market for a functional identical twin. If you come across one (even used) I am extremely interested.

Waiting impatiently to hear from you.

Alain ? 

There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and open a vein. 
Red Smith

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Don’t ever delude yourself into thinking that writing is easy. It is not.
It is a brain-swelling job that requires dogged determination and stamina.

A writer is basically an amalgam of a poet, a baker and a chiropractor. His job involves a lot of musing, kneading and massaging.

When you endeavor to write a story, you first need to come up with a subject. And it is not as easy as it sounds. Practically everything on earth has been written about… by others.
You want to present your personal view of an event, and (in my case) it is often opinionated.
I always thought that readers are not interested by bland accounts.

When you put together a story, you try to be true to yourself and express opinions in a civil manner and without unduly offending anybody. But regardless of the subject, you are bound to hurt someone’s feelings. It cannot be helped or avoided.

“I always start writing with a clean piece of paper and a dirty mind.”
Patrick Dennis

When I begin a piece, I start by quickly jotting down a temporary title and random thoughts, in no particular order. After this, I often go for a solitary walk mulling over what I wrote or what I should include. Exercise relieves the stress and gets the creative juices flowing.

After my constitutional I flesh out the story with details gathered on the Internet and then, like freshly kneaded dough, I let it rest. I sleep on it.

The second day I read my story again and pay attention to the fluidity of the text. A story should flow steadily, but not chaotically. It should be interesting, droll and provocative at the same time. I also check for repetitions and accuracy and that’s where the Internet comes handy. In doubt about a fact or a date? No worries mate, you Google it, a few times if necessary.

A text is massaged, kneaded and modified a countless number of times. Bless Microsoft’s “cut and paste” and “spell-checker” for that, but never blindly accept all the latter’s suggestions.
Once in a while I think of the time when everything was penned by hand and when editing must have been a nightmare.
I often reflect on Alexandre Dumas who employed it is said more than 45 “nègres” (ghostwriters) to write or correct his stories.
Today, thanks to word-processing, I can manage without even a “négrillon”.

When I am halfway through my story, I might change the working title if it not in synch with my story anymore. It happens often.
And finally, I try whenever I can to post an accompanying picture that I personally took.

No writing is useless. Its purpose is to make you pause and take a position on various issues.
If you let others do this for you (as seen recently), you are courting big trouble.

Alain

You never get a second chance to make a first impression.
Will Rogers

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When you apply for a job, experts agree that it is absolutely crucial to make a good first impression. You are basically a salesperson hawking a product, and the killer app is you.

Thus, you dress as best as you can and strive to make the best possible first impression.
You and your body language want to say: my smile and the way I present myself show that I am friendly, easy to get along, eager to work, and willing to blend smoothly with your workforce.

Similarly, an asylum seeker is akin to a job applicant saying, “I want to live in your country and share your way of life”.
But a woman wearing a veil, a hijab does not project this kind of message. By wearing a hijab she basically retreats behind a wall and ghettoizes herself and her family.

I wanted to know why some Muslim women elect to wear such a garment in western countries and I found an article in the UK Telegraph describing, “why Muslim women chose to wear the veil”.

Women variously said:

“I was forced to start wearing a hijab at the age of 13 and now find it hard and very uncomfortable to take it off in public.

This I understand. It is a habit and habits are notoriously difficult to break. But to flourish, women have to trample barriers erected by chauvinist men.

“I fear and love God, and He has said that women must cover their hair, so I follow what He tells me, simple as that.

God has nothing to do with this. She never said that women had to cover their hair. Jealous, insecure men decreed this and everything decreed by oppressors should be abolished.

“It honestly liberates me because I get to choose how much of myself I reveal to the public.”

Poppycock! Balderdash! Flapdoodle!

“The only times I wear a burqa – the black robe thing, is when I don’t feel like changing so I just throw it on when going somewhere.”

I find this difficult to believe. When I don’t feel like changing, I go as I am (warts and all) or I stay home. Donning a potato sack is not going to make me feel more comfortable and it will definitely make my interlocutors pretty uneasy.

Living better together is not erecting but toppling walls.
What the world (especially the Muslim world) needs are leaders like Mustafa Kemal Atatürk or Peter the Great who ordered their backward people to cut out the religious crap, and get in line with the rest of the world.

There is nothing more painful than a relapse. After years of steady improvements, the condition of women is jeopardized anew by retrograde populist zealots like Recep Erdogan or somebody closer to home.
A tradition is like plumbing. It needs to be regularly overhauled.

When in Rome… for crying out loud, eat spaghetti!

Alain