Pétanque is alive and well

Undeterred by the specter of Covid-19 (and the maddening, outrageous shortage of vaccines), pétanque is alive and well. Despite its macabre reputation, the virus might inadvertently have reinforced the bonds shared by all club members.

After months of forced isolation, everybody (included our pets) craves human contact, and open space… and pétanque is the ideal activity to fulfill those cravings.
Besides the healthy exertion provided by this discipline, pétanque also dispenses a much-needed dose of adrenaline and congeniality. Many come to the field to play, but also to relieve stress.

Today, when you play pétanque, you have to wear a mask, but unlike many other sports, you don’t make body contact with anybody. And talking about close proximity… during the pandemic, some people have used sex to relieve the stress. But did they wear a mask during this interlude? According to the experts, it would be safer to do so. Some people think that it adds spice to the occasion, but altogether most everybody agrees that pétanque is safer than sex… maybe a tad less stimulating.

OTTAWA (Reuters) – Skip kissing and consider wearing a mask when having sex to protect yourself from catching the coronavirus, Canada’s chief medical officer said on Wednesday, adding that going solo remains the lowest risk sexual option in a pandemic.

And for statistic lovers, pétanque burns way more calories than a romp in the sack. According to the New England Journal of Medicine, “the average bout of sexual activity lasts for only about six minutes” while a good round of pétanque can last between 3 or 4 hours, even more for some.

Lately, due in good part to Christine’s (our venerable president) recruiting efforts, we have seen a notable increase in new members. In the last few months, at least 10 women have joined our club, and some have become steady fixures on our field.

One especially comes to mind. Her name is Ann, and besides being a warm, funny human being, she now eats and breathes pétanque. She is eager to learn and has tremendously improved her game since she appeared on the field. When the time comes, she will make a solid tournament partner.

To sum it up, pétanque is alive and well, and growing in popularity… especially among women. Which is a good thing because…

“Those people who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.”

Those people, as irritating as they can be, are the indispensable addition to our club.


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