Hey criminals…

Stop your nefarious business!
Stop armed robberies and all that petty stuff! You won’t get away with it. There are cameras everywhere and everybody is now carrying a recording device. Your chances of success are practically nil.

As a friend, I would advise you to branch out to another racket. Instead of a career in crime you could try running for office. Many people do.
Lately, it looks like many latent criminals chose politics over criminality. It is cleaner, less risky, and let’s face it, the job has more perks than of a Mafia’s “made man”. It has also a better chance of pardon.

What qualifications do you need to be a leader of men? Not too many, judging by the last elections. Above all, you need to have a big mouth, a short memory and being impervious to controversy. The perfect candidate is a Teflon candidate.

In politics, you start small and little by little, through sponsors and seniority you will gain power and influence. A man who can dispense favors is then very likely to be romanced by lobbyists.

“Lobbying is the world’s second – oldest profession.” Bill Press

The wooing starts insidiously (like a nice little lunch) and after a while a politico can reap substantial benefits for mutually agreed favors. All in the guise of helping his constituents naturally.
Why do you think that we have so many ridiculous laws on the book?

There is a thin line between a politician and a criminal. As long as you are not caught, you are a “respected” statesman. But if you get snared with your hand in the cookie jar, the story takes a darker turn.

To avoid long prison terms, you might have to rat on your old friends and become a pariah. And no more invitations to the Hamptons.

But generally speaking, politics are safer than a life of crime. To start with, the members of the ruling class can always afford a good attorney, not the kind thrown to penniless miscreants. And if convicted, don’t believe for a minute that politicians will be incarcerated with the riffraff.

Do you think that Paul Manafort will spend his prison term locked in a little cell like a common prisoner? Not for a minute. He will spend time in a fancy Club Med-like “pay-to-stay” prison, definitely not the Sing Sing kind. Money is always a great facilitator.

Crime does not pay; politic does!

Alain