“Thanksgiving is an emotional time. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year he’s way too often.”
Johnny Carson
Every year the press makes a big hullaballoo of the President of the United States pardoning a rather puzzled looking turkey.
Pardoning?
What kind of crime has the turkey committed to benefit from the president’s clemency?
Has he murdered a bunch of people? Has he planted a bomb somewhere? Has he sold military secrets to ISIS?
No sir. That bird was accused of a crime he didn’t commit!
Shouldn’t it be the other way around?
Thanksgiving often reminds me of a cartoon that I saw in a magazine a few years ago.
It shows a chicken talking to a man and saying “Well he may be Colonel Sanders to you but to us, he’s Adolf Eichmann”.
Shouldn’t it be the turkey pardoning the president?
I definitely side with the chicken… And the turkeys.
Every year millions of turkey are slaughtered to celebrate Thanksgiving.
Turkeys shouldn’t be the centerpieces of this holiday.
Thanksgiving was originally a secular shindig to celebrate a successful harvest.
So the centerpieces should be harvest products, shouldn’t it?
I have to admit though that a turkey looks a little stupid… and vainglorious.
As far as I am concerned, when I think turkey, Donald Trump comes to mind.
Plump and garish.
His trophy wife (Slovenian born Melania) looks and sounds infinitely better than the Donald. Besides English, I understand that she is fluent in French, Slovenian, Serbian and Austrian German.
How many languages does the Donald speak? As far as I can tell, he speaks only in tongues.
But enough with turkeys of all sorts.
In a little while, they will just be faint memories.
Personally, I could easily do without turkey. It does not taste that great anyway.
I would happily go vegan or swap pieces of that bird for “escargots” or “cuisses de grenouilles”.
But that’s just me…
“Thanksgiving, man. Nor a good day to be my pants.”
Kevin James.
Happy “Donald Day” you all!
Alain