Today I purchased a new iPhone. The iPhone 6S that is. A gizmo that no metrosexual (a young, urban, heterosexual male with liberal political views, an interest in fashion, and a refined sense of taste) – I think that I closely match this description- can do without.
Not that I really need this gadget, but at my age I still want something to brag about.
I will celebrate this occasion by randomly calling a bunch of strangers to let them know the good news.
I will also try to reach the Pope. I have been told that he is a very understanding man and will talk to just about anybody. Why not me, even though I am a confirmed pagan?
The process of getting the new phone was extremely smooth.
About a week ago I made a reservation on line to get a new phone and Apple obliged me by setting a date and a time for our encounter.
My date was Friday, September 25th at 2:00 pm.
I showed up to the Corte Madera store at 1:50 pm and after showing my credentials I was asked to wait a few minutes. I waited no longer than 5 minutes. Then a very knowledgeable young man took me in charge and started the sale and installation processes.
Apple also gave me a credit of $165.00 for my old 5S phone and 30 minutes later I was on my way home.
I was truly tickled pink red with the smoothness of the process.
Jolly good show Apple!
Everybody who is anybody has got to have a cell phone. Not the antique flip phone mind you, but a smartphone that will faithfully obey your every command.
Siri, bring me my slippers!
Yes master.
That’s what a call a smart phone.
Parents who want to keep up with the Joneses start providing cell phones to their offspring as early as kindergarten. It is for their protection they say.
No matter that Johnny barely remember where he lives.
I noticed that men and women carry their phones differently. Men usually keep them in a pocket but women carry their phones in the open, like protecting amulets.
If bothered by ruffians they point their phones in the direction of the intruder while saying loudly “Vade retro satana”.
It does not always work. Sometimes the criminal grabs the phone and run.
But then according to Apple, you can neutralize the device and render it useless by using the lethal Kill Switch.
Does the phone self destroy? I hope so.
Before I leave you, a little rib tickler:
“After 20 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening, when the woman felt her husband begin to fondle her in ways he hadn’t in quite some time. It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, and then began moving down past the small of her back. He then caressed her shoulders and neck, slowly worked his hand down over her breasts, stopping just over her lower stomach. He then proceeded to place his hand on her left inner arm, caressed past the side of her breast again, working down her side, passed gently over her buttock and down her leg to her calf. Then, he proceeded up her inner thigh, stopping just at the uppermost portion of her leg. He continued in the same manner on her right side, then suddenly stopped, rolled over and became silent. As she had become quite aroused by this caressing, she asked in a loving voice, “Honey that was wonderful. Why did you stop?” “I found the remote cell phone,” he mumbled.”
GGPBL (Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!)
Alain