In my head I keep a bunch of little drawers.
They are labeled with tags such as “stupid”, “ridiculous”, “frivolous”, “cruel”, “cute”, “sexy”, “mean”, “vain”, “vulgar”, “nice”, “dangerous”, “friendly”, “freak”, etc.
When I meet somebody, after an often brief conversation, I stick that person’s name in one of those little boxes; because consciously or not, we are all judgmental.
It might not be fair, but we will judge you by the way you dress, the way you talk, the way you walk, etc. and our perceived first impressions will end up (and remain for a long time) in one of these little filing cabinets.
Some people are not good at assessing other people. It might have something to do with a lack of proper training in the “people-watching” department.
If you are not able to “read” somebody correctly, you are bound for a lot of headaches in the future.
Neville Chamberlain never “read” Hitler properly… with the consequences that we know. He probably classified him as “reasonable” instead of “freakish”. Hitler’s imperious little mustache should have been a clue though, but Neville failed to notice the ominous threat in Adolf’s crumb catcher.
I honed my people-watching skills in my impoverished student days. For the modest price of a cup of coffee, I could sit at a sidewalk café and practice my people-watching skills for hours.
I learned to read body language, vacant eyes, smirks, etc.
It served me well. In the following years, I avoided being shot by hostile “fellagas”, fired from a lifetime job and surviving a series of amorous conflicts.
So, when you meet somebody new, watch your mouth and your steps. Avoid making insensitive comments or unsettling body noises for as long as you possibly can.
Leave immediately after making even the slightest favorable impression, for it will linger for a long time.
To sum it up, always strive to create a good first impression, otherwise in a near future, an avenging Soup Nazi will pop up and decree “No soup for you!”
Alain