My new machine

La Deuche

A few decades ago, when I formally took possession of my new machine, I was thrilled. It worked extremely well and required very little maintenance. This was a very good thing because at the time I did not know what the word meant.

In many respects, my machine bore many similarities with the iconic Citroën 2CV (La Deuche). It was made in France, it had a compact but sturdy body, it was frugal, and it was extremely versatile. And it was meant to last. And by George, it did! It served me well for many years. I took it to many places and exposed it to many different (often scary) situations; we always came out smelling like a rose, without any scratch.

I used the machine (and probably abused it) somewhat carelessly. But it endured… Until a few years ago when it started to show some wear and tear. I had to take it to some clinic for a complete physical. Technicians started to mention and even emphasize the word “maintenance”, a term foreign to all whippersnappers like me.

Only old fogies care about maintenance, isn’t it? Young people are impervious to decay and don’t give a hoot about maintenance. We don’t need no stinky maintenance!

But with time, you start to reconsider your actions. The old fogies might have known something that we didn’t… Was it possible? I discovered that some parts of my machine were worn out and in need of repair. I was told for instance that a tooth in my mouth had to be pulled out and replaced with an implant.

After all these years of faithful service, my machine deserved a break. Then a few months later. I discovered that I had some cataract in my right eye. Then I started to experience a nagging backache. Little by little, I was made aware that my now older machine did not perform as well as when it was in its prime.

What happened? I don’t feel old, but it seems that my machine is balking at accomplishing the simplest tasks. The nerves… It looks like I need a new one. As an Amazon fan, I look forward to the days when you will be able to order some new body parts online. Amazon, I need a new kidney… Yes sir, thank you for your order. It will be on your doorstep tomorrow morning!

You should not laugh. Who would have ever believed that you could purchase almost anything online with the click of a mouse?
But don’t ever neglect maintenance. If you want your machine to keep running smoothly, don’t scrimp and start early! Pamper your machine and you won’t have to order new parts from Amazon for a long time.

Alain

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